I started off with a bad mood today, early in the morning. An intent of hate came to me today. Obviously something "wonderful" gonna happen. I just know it. I just sense it. But the worse thing is I don't know why.
Breakfast after EME, I wasn't much in a mood. Just grab my breakfast and sit at a corner to eat alone. My friend join me later and chat awhile but since I am grumpy I just kept my words short and sharp. I lost my appetite when my friend sneeze over my breakfast so I just drink tea for the day. Still even when I am moody, my friend just ask the reason why, asking you got a problem with my social life or in camp but I just tell him nothing to worry about.
SAF day full dress rehearsal today only this time is with the real tailored No.1 uniform. like all rehearsals only today we did twice, two full runs. We have our photos taken today, in our white uniform. =)
On parade I just do my job for the day, nice and sweet, don't want to use up alot of my strength. They just make some sarcastic jokes bout me but they just pick the wrong day. Don't wanna do anything stupid so JUST calm myself down. I am just not in the mood. The bayonet is very nearby... My fingers still hurt from the last injury and I can't clench well still the pain is nothing to me compare the pain in been through emotionally.
The day ended. Just about ready to change and book out, we are called to Fall in at the parade square. Something big have happen and that just made me a little worse. A little splice of anger. Since this matter regarding bout military stuff I cannot say what happen but I do know that it will lead to one month confinement and no pay for the next month, even though its not our fault. great huh....very nice indeed....Hated seems to make me stand aground alittle.
So- I book out for my medical appointment for tomorrow, at 11am. Missed the bus...Cannot call a cab....My dad too tired to fetch me (can't blame him, he work hard for the family)...so I am stranded....wow~
Lucky the Ba Chor Mee seller came to deliver the food to the hungry people in the camp. So 3 guys and Me are lucky to be send home by him. Thanks ar uncle. Took a bus home and reach around 12 am.
Is not long, I can say... before the 2nd me come to reveal himself in this world. My feelings are getting more and more worse. Miserable, Hate, Used. Very soon....very soon.... Don't worry for the people who know me. I am still the nice person you all know and I will be remain as it is.
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